Who’s Got Control of My Life?

Cheesy title, but I’m reading the book The Seven Dumbest Relationship Mistakes Smart People Make by Carolyn N. Bushong. The two following quotes just hit home with me; I want to document them…

“Ending a pattern of playing the martyr requires that you drop the illusions, the excuses, and the fairy tales and really begin to see things as they are – not as you would like them to be.  … Vow that you will not only stop allowing [fill in the blank] to treat you badly but also stand up to anyone who tries to control you in any way.” (italics mine)

Martyrs often ask others for criticism because they feel inadequate and mistakenly believe that such criticism will help them improve themselves. … [they] depend on how others view them for their self-esteem.  The problem with this is that others judge us according to their own values, not according to ours.” (italics mine)

Honestly, I’m learning as much about how I do employment, as how I do relationships.  The two are not so different when there is a common denominator… me.


~ by Eva on August 22, 2010.

2 Responses to “Who’s Got Control of My Life?”

  1. Hmmm….so I guess that means you’re about to make some major changes in your life & take control of your own existence. That’s something we all as people need to work on for there’s always someone looking to take advantage. Life certainly bring lessons & if we pay attention, there’s always an awesome revelation. Congrats on your newest discovery. Be easy;)

  2. I don’t know about major external changes (though there is the possibility of those too), but definitely some major *internal* changes. Or at least the beginnings of those. It’s a process. 🙂 Thanks for commenting!

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