About Me

Short version:           

Friend, athlete, pianist

Calm, introverted, dreamer

30 year-old, American, female

Counselor (LCSW)

Long version:

I love cucumbers.

I have traveled the world.

I’m really good at folding fitted-sheets.

I work hard to be continually learning.  That is the key, I think, to being able to look at myself, others, the world, and life in general, with an open mind and with the ability to appreciate the good without omitting the bad.

I find everything interesting, even things I know little about.  History, politics, sociology, psychology, and philosophy/religion are some of my favorite subjects to read about, and I also like classic novels (i.e. Crime and Punishment, Christy, One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest, etc.).  At any given time I’m in the middle of ten or so books.

I thoroughly enjoy playing most sports, especially soccer, basketball, ultimate frisbee, and also running distance, which I do on a regular basis.

I’m generally a quiet observer of people, but I also enjoy one-on-one conversations.

By nature and nurture I’m a very loyal friend, but it’s easy cause I have amazing ones.  They challenge me, enjoy me, and care about me with astounding depth and consistency.  The same thing can be said about my family.

After so many teenage years of being uncomfortable in my own skin, my mantra has finally become one of genuine self-acceptance.  The relief that has come with that cognitive shift is a constant, pervasive, profound, and most blessed relief.  I wish it for all who do not have it.

I have a passion for social justice, which has flourished under the auspices of some amazing professors, both at the undergraduate and graduate levels.  I plan on working professionally in this area for the rest of my life while at the same time remaining committed to personally living on the right side of social history, especially in regards to the most marginalized members of the human race.

If I died today at age 30, I would die feeling like I’ve lived a wonderful, fulfilling life.

Really Long version (as told to me by a version of Myers-Briggs):

(I’ve underlined the things I strongly agree with…)

INFP
Introverted iNtuitive Feeling Perceiving

The Idealist

As an INFP, your primary mode of living is focused internally, where you deal with things according to how you feel about them, or how they fit into your personal value system. Your secondary mode is external, where you take things in primarily via your intuition.

INFPs, more than other iNtuitive Feeling types, are focused on making the world a better place for people. Their primary goal is to find out their meaning in life. What is their purpose? How can they best serve humanity in their lives? They are idealists and perfectionists, who drive themselves hard in their quest for achieving the goals they have identified for themselves

INFPs are highly intuitive about people. They rely heavily on their intuitions to guide them, and use their discoveries to constantly search for value in life. They are on a continuous mission to find the truth and meaning underlying things. Every encounter and every piece of knowledge gained gets sifted through the INFP’s value system, and is evaluated to see if it has any potential to help the INFP define or refine their own path in life. The goal at the end of the path is always the same – the INFP is driven to help people and make the world a better place.

Generally thoughtful and considerate, INFPs are good listeners and put people at ease. Although they may be reserved in expressing emotion, they have a very deep well of caring and are genuinely interested in understanding people. This sincerity is sensed by others, making the INFP a valued friend and confidante. An INFP can be quite warm with people he or she knows well.

INFPs do not like conflict, and go to great lengths to avoid it. If they must face it, they will always approach it from the perspective of their feelings. In conflict situations, INFPs place little importance on who is right and who is wrong. They focus on the way that the conflict makes them feel, and indeed don’t really care whether or not they’re right. They don’t want to feel badly. This trait sometimes makes them appear irrational and illogical in conflict situations. On the other hand, INFPs make very good mediators, and are typically good at solving other people’s conflicts, because they intuitively understand people’s perspectives and feelings, and genuinely want to help them.

INFPs are flexible and laid-back, until one of their values is violated. In the face of their value system being threatened, INFPs can become aggressive defenders, fighting passionately for their cause. When an INFP has adopted a project or job which they’re interested in, it usually becomes a “cause” for them. Although they are not detail-oriented individuals, they will cover every possible detail with determination and vigor when working for their “cause”.

When it comes to the mundane details of life maintenance, INFPs are typically completely unaware of such things. They might go for long periods without noticing a stain on the carpet, but carefully and meticulously brush a speck of dust off of their project booklet.

INFPs do not like to deal with hard facts and logic. Their focus on their feelings and the Human Condition makes it difficult for them to deal with impersonal judgment. They don’t understand or believe in the validity of impersonal judgment, which makes them naturally rather ineffective at using it. Most INFPs will avoid impersonal analysis, although some have developed this ability and are able to be quite logical. Under stress, it’s not uncommon for INFPs to mis-use hard logic in the heat of anger, throwing out fact after (often inaccurate) fact in an emotional outburst.

INFPs have very high standards and are perfectionists. Consequently, they are usually hard on themselves, and don’t give themselves enough credit. INFPs may have problems working on a project in a group, because their standards are likely to be higher than other members’ of the group. In group situations, they may have a “control” problem. The INFP needs to work on balancing their high ideals with the requirements of every day living. Without resolving this conflict, they will never be happy with themselves, and they may become confused and paralyzed about what to do with their lives.

INFPs are usually talented writers. They may be awkard and uncomfortable with expressing themselves verbally, but have a wonderful ability to define and express what they’re feeling on paper. INFPs also appear frequently in social service professions, such as counselling or teaching. They are at their best in situations where they’re working towards the public good, and in which they don’t need to use hard logic.

INFPs who function in their well-developed sides can accomplish great and wonderful things, which they will rarely give themselves credit for. Some of the great, humanistic catalysts in the world have been INFPs.


28 Responses to “About Me”

  1. Dear evalawrie:

    My name is Leora Trub and I am a student in the Clinical Psychology Ph.D. Program at The Graduate Center of the City University of New York (CUNY). I am conducting a study of the reasons that people blog and what benefits it brings, which at this point are still largely unexplored in research studies. I am therefore reaching out to you as a blogger who can help deepen our understanding of this phenomenon. I believe that your voice is an important one to be heard and hope you will enjoy participating in the study. I have developed an online questionnaire that asks about specific aspects of blogging as well as asking about feelings about yourself and others in your life. The survey is a mix of numerical scales and opportunities to reflect in an open-ended format about the role of blogging in your life, and how it has changed over time.

    You are eligible to participate if you are at least 21 years of age and have been maintaining an English-language personal blog for at least six months that you update or visit at least twice a week (on average). Your participation involves completing a confidential online questionnaire. The data will be downloaded onto a secure server to which only I have access. No identifying information, such as your names or address, will be collected. If you desire, you may choose not to share your blog name, in which case I will not access your blog for any reason after this point. If you do share your blog name, it will NOT be connected to your responses in the survey. Additionally, you will be given the opportunity to be identified by a code name in research reports and to have your blog description changed slightly so it cannot be identified.

    The survey takes approximately 45 minutes to complete and participation is completely voluntary. Three participants who complete the survey will be randomly selected by a lottery to receive a $75 cash prize.

    There are no foreseeable risks to participation in the study. Although some of the questions are personal in nature, participation in the study provides an opportunity to think about the role that your blog plays in your life.

    If you have any questions about this research, you can contact me at (732) 407-7928 or ltrub@gc.cuny.edu, or my advisors Dr. Arietta Slade at (212) 650-5658 or arietta.slade@gmail.com and Dr. Tracey Revenson at (212) 817-8709 or trevenson@gc.cuny.edu.

    The study has been approved by the Institutional Review Board of the Graduate School of the City University of New York and meets of their guidelines as well as all state and federal guidelines for research with human participants. If you have any concerns about the project at any time, you can contact Ms. Kay Powell, Institutional Review Board at the Graduate School of the City University of New York (212) 817-7525 or kpowell@gc.cuny.edu.

    In order to participate in this study, I need to send you an invitation through survey monkey. If you are interested, please send an email to ltrub@gc.cuny.edu from the email address to which you would like the invitation sent. I hope that you will decide to participate and also that you will share it with others if you decide you would like to. Please feel free to contact me with any questions.

    Sincerely,

    Leora Trub, M.A.

    Doctoral student in Clinical Psychology
    Graduate School of the City University of New York
    365 Fifth Avenue, New York, NY 10016-4309
    ltrub@gc.cuny.edu

  2. haiii… I love you’re blog and all the things you wrote. Hopefully, I can grow like you too

  3. Great blog. Keep up the great work. Looking to read more about about your personal quest:)))

  4. Hi, nice to meet you !

  5. You blog is fantastic 🙂

  6. Ur blog is intresting !!

  7. Hey…. I also like cucumbers. and i love that….

    Shammi Sarwan
    (Disigner – Buzz Temporary Tattoos)

    http://www.temporarytattoos.in

  8. Nice blog!

  9. something different, extra ordinary from ordinary, i was attracted to your style of living and expressing! wow!

  10. I like your words and Rilke’s. You have courage and know the joy and peace experienced by clinging to it like an old friend when needed. Our souls can be sketched by a Myers-Briggs chart, but we are much, much more wonderful – and infinitely loved by the One in and through whom we become fully human. May the intimacy your share this season touch and refresh your soul – merry Christmas.

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